It has been an interesting year so far. Over the last month I’ve started a new position as the Development Manager at the Department of Environment and Conservation. Technically it’s a transfer to another position in another department. But it feels more like a move to a new company. It is filled with challenges as we reorganize and retool and I get the benefit of hiring my own team; but I’m not going to have the time to get to learn about the organization and develop a real sense of what my stakeholder’s needs are and what our strengths and weaknesses are. I have to admit that this has left me a little frustrated and disenfranchised. What is the point of it all if I’m not going to be able to do it right and build something that will have a permanent and lasting effect?
With spring upon us the weather has turned warmer and my yard is beckoning me to pay attention to it. I actually really love getting my hands dirty and working on landscaping projects. I haven’t had time to really work on it, however, because I currently have a project that I started a few months ago to remodel my laundry room that remains unfinished. I really don’t have any excuses except for maybe motivation. These have now turned into chores instead of being fun projects. It’s too easy to put off these projects when the weather is just perfect for a hike.
All of this has left me with a sense of just being busy. Last year I intentionally let things go and backed off of many of my commitments. I really prioritized the things that were important to me and I tried to focus on those. This year has so far been a year that Carrie and I have tried to “get back to normal”. I’ve jumped back into yard projects, home improvements, technology meet ups, and so on. All the same stuff that I was doing before. Apparently I still haven’t learned how to say no and to focus on the things that matter to me.
It is a good time for me to work on this. To internalize the busyness and to learn to not over commit to projects and to really get an idea of how I want to live. As Carrie mentioned in her previous post, we are making plans for the future. And what can be has me excited.